I was surfing on facebook again...seems like I really have nothing else better to do. Came across my old schoolmate's photographs. Honestly it doesn't look like how she was and I only graduated from secondary school 2 years ago. Then I realise what made her look so pretty as compared to before was make-up. Yea make-up works wonders but when I think about it further, when someone sees her real looks without the make-up, what would they think? Make-up, as I learnt last night, has the ability to conceal, to hide. Unfortunately I realise it cant change the real us, change facts. I saw on the train this morning, a woman was staring blankly into space. Her stare was rather deathly but was also amusing. She then picked up her mirror and tried to apply mascara, looking into the mirror with the same deathly stare. Make-up can change whats on her face but cant never change who she really is, the way she looks at things. Don't get me started on the failures of make-up when people look like clowns unintentionally.

It was then I made connections make-up to lies. Similarly, lies conceals facts, identity, but is unable to truely conceal one's nature. You can change facts with lies but you cant change who u truely are deep down.

3:32 PM
she told her story

Random...been listening to a song by Alicia Keys...I know I'm a little slow but still its a great song

If I aint got you

Some people live for the fortune
Some people live just for the fame
Some people live for the power
Some people live just to play the game

Some people think that the physical things define whats within
And I've been there before
But that life's a bore
So full of the superficial

Some people want it all
But I dont want nothing at all
If it aint you baby
If I aint got u baby

some people want diamond rings
some just want everything
but everything means nothing
If I aint got you, yeah

Some people search for a fountain
Promises forever young
Some people need 3 dozen roses
That's the only way to prove you love them

Hand me the world on a silver platter
And what good would it be
No one to share
No one who truly cares for me

Some people want it all
But I dont want nothing at all
If it aint you baby
If i aint got you baby

Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I aint got you, you, you

Some people want it all
But I dont want nothing at all
If it aint u baby
If I aint got you baby

Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I aint got you, yeah

If I aint got you with me baby
So nothing in this whole wide world
Dont mean a thing
If I aint got you with me baby

12:41 PM
she told her story

I came across a status posted by a boy in secondary school on facebook and it really got me thinking. He posted something along the lines of "How on earth can I body-building anymore if I can't take protein,eggs and protein shakes because I am allergic to it?". Was body-building to get those extreme bulging muscles like those you see on those body-building magazines that important (considering that the boy was only in secondary school)? And is the high intake of protein crucial for body-building and that can it be attained through other ways? But those questions are only for the superficial. What I wanted to know is whether what we want in our lives is that important and what determines how important it is. Somehow because of the unanswered questions I came to a conclusion (unless someone can prove me otherwise, I might change my stand) that we have all missed the point of living in the pursuit of our desires that may not even be neccessary in our lives. :( Take studying for great results for example, (i know most of us hate studying and only want good grades to do well in life) the societal conventions requires us to do well in school and graduate from universities or better yet get a masters in order to get a job and "do well"(I have my reserves about having money=doing well/being happy) in life. But in pursuing all these great "pleasures", we miss out on so much more. I know of people spending all their time on studying (mugging) 24 hours a day and forget that life is so much more than that. That life is also about having a social life and relationships with family members and so on, to be truely happy and honestly being able to tell yourself at the end of your life that your life was one worth spending.(If you were to say that studying and not having anything other than good grades is a life worth studying is a life worth living, I really don't know how to save you).

But I have to acknowledge the fact that without good grades and what society expects of us, we will probably never be able to do anything to make our lives worth living, for we despite knowing that these expectations are sometimes pointless and doesn't make sense, we are still a part of this society.

6:56 PM
she told her story

I don't want this feelings inside me...I know now that I can't fully be a bad person because my conscience and guilt will eat me alive. I want it my way. I will admit that I am selfish. I admit that it was my personal interest and thoughts that drove me nuts. I don't want to sugar coat it and make it look like its not my fault. I'm sorry

10:07 PM
she told her story

i miss you babe...what i said still stands...if it is meant to be, it'll happen somehow

9:34 PM
she told her story

Deary, I meant everything I said...Did you?

8:05 PM
she told her story

I trust in you Babe, I trust in you...

8:16 PM
she told her story